An 8 year old little Toby bullied around with his fellow classmates bragging to them that his dad can eat light bulbs..So, his teacher heard it and want to hear the whole thing, so the teacher asked,"What's with the light bulb?"

Little Toby said, "Well, when bedtime, as I walk by my parents room to brush my teeth, I heard dad that he told my mom to turn off light and bring it to him so he can ate it, next thing I heard was my mom is cheering for him saying YES!YES!!THATS IT!!" So, the teacher said to himse, "What a light bulb she got there.."

I got to looking at the parole laws here in Texas. I've been married for 32 yrs. Found out that if i had shot my wife when I met her I would be free by now.

What do you call a brunette in the middle of a group of blonds? The interpreter.

Still waiting in ER. Why the three hour wait? Because a woman purposefully ran over her husband for not bringing her something on valentines day. No....this is not a joke.

A young man is sent to prison for 15 years for a bank robbery. The 25,000,00 had never been found. One day he gets a letter from his wife, she tells him things are really fancily tough and she wants to dig up the back yard to plant potatoes. He writes back, "DON'T GO NEAR THE BACK YARD." Two day's later he get letter from his wife the FBI was here and doug up the back yard. He writes back, "Great, now you can plant thoes potatoes."